TRAINING COURSES
START COUNSELLING
TRAINING COURSES
Menu
Menu

Pippa Byng

About Pippa Byng

http://www.gloscounselling.org.uk

Posts by Pippa Byng:

The Bulletin Website images (1)

Understanding EMDR

← Previous Page

Understanding EMDR

At our counselling charity, we’re committed to offering a safe, thoughtful space where people can explore and heal from what troubles them most deeply. Most of our counsellors have trained with us in psychodynamic approaches, which focus on the unconscious patterns that shape our lives and relationships. Others bring different therapeutic perspectives, ensuring we can offer the right support for each individual. Some of our therapists are also trained in Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR), a therapy that’s attracting growing interest among those seeking help with trauma. In this post, we’ll explain what EMDR is, how it works, and how it can complement other forms of counselling to support meaningful, lasting change.

What is EMDR?

EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing. It is a structured, evidence-based therapy developed by Francine Shapiro in the late 1980s. EMDR is best known as an effective treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but it is increasingly used to help with other difficulties such as anxiety, phobias, complicated grief, and performance anxiety.

Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR helps people process distressing memories that are stuck in the nervous system. When traumatic or overwhelming events happen, the brain’s usual way of storing memories can be disrupted. This means that, rather than becoming part of the past, traumatic memories can stay vivid and intrusive, often bringing back the same feelings of fear, shame, or helplessness that were felt at the time.

EMDR uses bilateral stimulation (usually side-to-side eye movements, taps, or sounds) while the client recalls parts of the traumatic memory. This process helps the brain reprocess the memory so it becomes less emotionally charged and more integrated. Many people say that memories feel more distant and less distressing after EMDR sessions.

How Does EMDR Work?

While researchers continue to study how EMDR works, the main theory is that bilateral stimulation helps the brain’s natural information processing system to restart, much like REM sleep does when we dream.

A typical EMDR session includes:

  1. Assessment and preparation: You and your therapist identify a specific memory or issue to work on and practise ways to feel safe and grounded.
  2. Desensitisation: You hold the memory in mind while doing bilateral stimulation.
  3. Reprocessing: New, healthier beliefs and feelings are encouraged to emerge. For example, instead of “I am powerless”, you may come to feel “I did my best and I am safe now.”
  4. Integration: The therapist helps you link these new insights into your wider sense of self and life story.

Sessions are always paced carefully with your wellbeing and readiness in mind.

EMDR and Psychodynamic Counselling: How Do They Work Together?

For many people, EMDR is not a standalone quick fix but part of a longer journey of self-understanding and healing. This is where a psychodynamic approach can deepen the work.

Psychodynamic counselling explores the unconscious roots of our patterns: our early relationships, unspoken fears, defences, and the ways we repeat what we can’t yet fully know. It helps us make sense of why certain memories hold so much power and why, for example, a single experience of shame can echo throughout our adult life.

When used together, EMDR can help resolve the raw emotional pain of trauma, while psychodynamic work offers space to understand the context and meaning that surround it. This way, EMDR and psychodynamic therapy can complement each other: one focuses on reprocessing stuck parts of the nervous system, while the other attends to the deeper story of who we are and how we relate to others.

Is EMDR Right for Me?

Not everyone wants or needs EMDR, and not all trauma work has to include it. Some people find that psychodynamic therapy alone gives them enough space to process past experiences. Others appreciate an approach where EMDR is used for specific memories while the therapeutic relationship holds the bigger picture.

Your therapist will help you think about whether EMDR might be helpful for you, and when to introduce it. Some people prefer to start with stabilisation and insight work, building trust and emotional resources before working with traumatic memories directly. Others feel ready to try EMDR earlier on.

What Can I Expect from an EMDR Session?

Clients often wonder, “Will I lose control?” or “Will I have to relive everything?” You stay in control throughout. Unlike hypnosis, EMDR does not put you in an altered state. You remain present and aware, and you can pause at any time.

The process can bring up strong emotions and bodily sensations, but a trained EMDR therapist will help you manage these feelings safely. 

After a session, you may feel tired or notice new thoughts and dreams as your mind continues to process. It can help to plan some quiet time and keep a journal.

How Do I Find a Qualified EMDR Therapist?

In the UK, EMDR therapists should have accredited training beyond their core counselling or psychotherapy qualification. Look for practitioners registered with EMDR UK or the EMDR Europe Association.

At our charity, our EMDR-trained therapists also have their core experience in psychodynamic work. This means they bring understanding about how past relationships and unconscious patterns may influence your experience of trauma and recovery.

Final Thoughts

Everyone’s journey is unique. EMDR is not a magic wand, but for many, it is a powerful tool that, when combined with the insight and depth of psychodynamic therapy, can help loosen the grip of the past.

If you’d like to know more about whether EMDR could support you, please get in touch. Together, we can think about the safest, most meaningful way forward for you.

References:

 

  • Shapiro, F. (1989). Efficacy of the Eye Movement Desensitization Procedure in the Treatment of Traumatic Memories. Journal of Traumatic Stress, 2(2), 199–223.
  • Stickgold, R. (2002). EMDR: A putative neurobiological mechanism of action. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 58(1), 61–75.
  • EMDR Association UK: https://emdrassociation.org.uk/
The Bulletin Website images

Anxiety is Ruining My Life: You’re Not Alone

← Previous Page

Anxiety is Ruining My Life: You’re Not Alone 

Anxiety. For some of us, it can seem to come out of nowhere, one minute you think you are doing fine, the next you are noticing your mind is racing, your body is restless, you feel sweaty and like you want to be anywhere else but where you are. For others, anxiety is a constant companion, worries constantly playing over and over again in your mind, that you cannot seem to stop. However you are experiencing anxiety, it can feel debilitating and like it is ruining your life. It can seriously affect our ability to be present in relationships, can prevent us from socialising or going to work, and have a very real impact on our lives, preventing us of being able to feel relaxed, joyful or peaceful.  

Whilst we know that anxiety is a common and natural, and that anxiety is an evolutionary response to threats we may have experienced long ago, at GCS we also know that feeling unable to get hold of your anxiety can feel frustrating, demoralising and leaves us feeling ‘is this ever going to get better?’. 

You might be experiencing a range of symptoms, both physical and psychological. Physically, you might notice things like a racing heart, shortness of breath, sweating, trembling, nausea, dizziness, or headaches. Psychologically, you might struggle with constant worry, difficulty concentrating, irritability, restlessness, feeling overwhelmed, or even a sense of impending doom. These symptoms can be incredibly distressing, and it’s understandable to feel like anxiety is taking over your life. 

It’s important to remember that you are not weak, and you are not failing. Anxiety disorders are real medical conditions, just like any other illness. They are not a character flaw or a sign of weakness. They are often caused by a combination of factors, including stressful events that have happened to us, putting pressure on ourselves to be ‘strong’ or feeling overwhelmed by our feelings and emotions. Understanding this can be the first step towards breaking down the stigma surrounding mental health and seeking the help you need. 

So, what can you do if anxiety is ruining your life? The good news is that there are effective treatments available. Here are some steps you can take: 

  1. Acknowledge and Validate Your Feelings: Don’t try to brush your anxiety under the rug or tell yourself to “just calm down.” Acknowledge that your feelings are real and valid. Allow yourself to feel anxious without judgment. Being able to say to ourselves ‘right now I’m feeling anxious about this situation and so I’m going to take care of myself’ can stop us from criticising ourselves for feeling anxious. Often, we can be our own worst critic. Journalling can be a great way to write down our feelings, helping to get thoughts and feelings out of our heads and onto paper. 
  2. Seek Professional Help: Talking to a mental health professional, such as a counsellor or therapist, is crucial. They can help you understand the root causes of your anxiety, develop coping strategies, explore other areas in your life that may be contributing to your feeling of anxiety, and providing you with a space to talk to someone who isn’t going to judge you for how you are feeling. 
  3. Practice Relaxation Techniques: Incorporating relaxation techniques into your daily routine can make a significant difference. Deep breathing exercises, mindfulness meditation, yoga, and progressive muscle relaxation can help calm your nervous system and reduce anxiety symptoms. There are many resources available online and through apps that can guide you through these practices.
  4. Thinking about how our lifestyle can help: Certain lifestyle changes can also have a positive impact on anxiety. These include:
  • Regular Exercise: Physical activity is a natural mood booster and can help reduce stress and anxiety. Many people report feeling that exercise helps with their anxiety, whether that is a walk in the woods or going to the gym. Find a way to add in a way of exercising into your life that is enjoyable, so you are more likely to stick to it. Even 10-15mins a day can have a huge benefit.  
  • Healthy Diet: Eating a balanced diet, avoiding excessive caffeine and alcohol, and staying hydrated can improve your overall well-being and reduce anxiety symptoms.  
  • Sufficient Sleep: Getting enough sleep is essential for both physical and mental health. Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep each night. If you struggle getting to sleep or staying asleep due to your anxiety, try listening to calming sounds, or reading a book before going to sleep. Reducing screen time before is also known to help us fall asleep easier.  
  • Connect with Others: Spending time with loved ones, engaging in social activities, and building strong relationships can provide support and reduce feelings of isolation, which can exacerbate anxiety. A nice chat with a friend can take our mind off the things we are worrying about, giving us a much needed distraction and break from our anxiety.  
  1. Be Patient and Kind to Yourself: Overcoming anxiety is a journey, not a destination. There will be some good days and also bad days or moments. Be patient with yourself, celebrate small victories, and don’t get discouraged by setbacks. Remember that healing takes time and effort, and each person needs to find what helps them most in managing their anxiety. 
  2. Remember You Are Not Alone: Many people experience anxiety, and there are lots of resources available to help. Connecting with support groups or online communities can provide a sense of belonging and understanding. Sharing your experiences with others who understand can be incredibly useful in helping us to feel less alone with it. We can also hear from others to find out things they have tried to make them feel less anxious. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and like anxiety is ruining your life, please reach out to us for help. You don’t have to suffer in silence or feel that you should be able to ‘just deal with it’. Many people are struggle with anxiety exactly as you are, and many people find ways to manage their anxiety so that they can feel like it no longer runs their life.  Take the first step today, and begin your journey towards a calmer, more fulfilling life. 

 

1

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

← Previous Page

Feeling the Winter Blues? How Counselling Can Help with SAD

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), often called the “winter blues,” is a type of depression that occurs during specific seasons, typically winter. Although people can think it is just a bit of a low mood, Seasonal Affective Disorder can have a very real and negative effect on people, causing serious low mood and depression. If you find yourself experiencing low mood, fatigue, and a lack of interest in activities during the colder months, you might be struggling with SAD.
 

What is SAD?

SAD is believed to be linked to reduced exposure to sunlight, which can disrupt your body’s natural production of melatonin and serotonin. These hormones play crucial roles in regulating mood, sleep, and appetite.
 
When we have depression or low mood through Seasonal Affective Disorder, this can significantly impact a person’s life in various ways, including their relationships. When someone is experiencing low mood, they may withdraw socially, becoming less engaged and responsive to others. This can strain relationships with friends, family, and partners. Irritability and increased sensitivity to criticism, common symptoms of low mood, can lead to frequent arguments and conflicts.
 
Furthermore, low mood can diminish a person’s enjoyment of activities they previously found pleasurable, impacting their ability to connect with others through shared experiences. This isolation and emotional distance can further exacerbate feelings of loneliness and low self-esteem, creating a cycle that negatively impacts both the individual and their relationships.
 

How can Counselling Help?

You do not need to suffer with the impact of SAD alone. While light therapy is often recommended for SAD, counselling can be a valuable complementary treatment. Here’s how:
  • Identifying Triggers: Counselling can help you pinpoint the specific factors that trigger your SAD symptoms. This could include social isolation, changes in routine, or specific environmental factors, all of which can have a huge impact on our feeling of mental wellbeing. 
  • Developing Coping Strategies: Therapists can equip you with practical coping mechanisms to manage low mood, such as:  
    • Mindfulness and relaxation techniques: These can help you manage stress and anxiety associated with SAD.
    • Improving sleep hygiene: Counselling can help you establish healthy sleep patterns, which can significantly impact your mood.
    • Social support: Therapists can encourage you to connect with others and build a strong support network. 
  • Lifestyle Adjustments: Counselling can help you make lifestyle changes that can improve your mood, such as:
    • Increasing physical activity: Even short walks in daylight can have a positive impact on your mental well-being.
    • Improving your diet: Ensuring you’re getting enough vitamin D and other essential nutrients can boost your mood. 
Remember:
SAD is a treatable condition. If you’re struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out for professional help from us. Counselling with Gloucestershire Counselling Service can provide you with the tools and support you need to navigate the challenges of SAD and improve your quality of life.